Sample Sunday: Let Him Cheat In Peace

Gossip_Queens2The following excerpt if from my upcoming book, Gossip Queens, which is scheduled for release December 2, 2017

**Explicit language** 

“Yeah, I know Chyna lies a lot, but I don’t think she is about this. But at this point, I almost don’t even care anymore. But if I do find out he’s fucking some hoe up here, I’ma beat her ass.”

“If you don’t care, why you trying to fight her?” Shonda smirked.

“Because it’s trifling as hell, that’s why. Everybody up here knows I’m with Dre.”

Shonda gave another nonchalant shrug. “True, but if you ask me, it’s stupid fighting over a nigga who you already know is cheating on you every chance he gets. You let him do it, so why get mad? Let that man cheat in peace, hell.”

“Excuse me?! Cheat in peace? What you mean by that?” Brittany looked at Shonda as if she hadn’t heard her correctly.

“I was watching this reality show the other night and this group of ladies were talking about checking your man’s phone and all that if you think he’s cheating and one of them said something like ‘unless you’re going to kick his ass to the curb there’s no point in getting mad, because you’re apparently comfortable with being cheated on; so stop bothering him, checking his phone, and Facebook stalking and trying to fight other bitches over him, ‘cause you ain’t going no damn where anyway.’”

“I said I was getting tired of Dre cheating on me.”

“That’s what your mouth said, but what did you do when you walked in your apartment the other day and he was laid up with another chick? Or how about the time you caught him in bed with a bitch and he made you get in bed with them and have a threesome? You didn’t say a damn thing, so it doesn’t sound like you’re too tired,” Shonda said flippantly as she took another sip of Coke. She was sick and tired of listening to Brittany bitching about Dre.

“What’s with your attitude?” Brittany asked defensively. “You’re being extra rude right now.”

“I’m not being rude, I’m being real. Dre does that shit to you because he knows you’re weak and he can get over on you.”

“Oh so now I’m weak? You know what, I’m getting real sick and tired of you getting all slick out the mouth every time I talk to you about Dre. Hell, sometimes you act like you’re fucking him,” Brittany shot back.

“Girl, please,” Shonda scoffed. “You know what, since my mouth is so slick, how about you find someone else to cry to the next time Dre cheats on you, because I’m tired of hearing it,” Shonda said as she stood and gathered her belongings. “You really are a weak bitch,” she spat as she exited the break room.



Shonda knew she was being unnecessarily rude to Brittany, but the girl got on her last damn nerve and hearing that Dre had been busted with another girl only made her attitude worse. She should have just went ahead and admitted to Brittany that she was fucking Dre, but Brittany just might have been crazy enough to try and fight her and she wasn’t trying to lose her job, especially over some dick.

And besides, Shonda wasn’t in any position to be fighting anyway. She had been throwing up a lot lately, having to use the bathroom a lot more frequently, and she’d been eating more than usual…all signs of pregnancy. It wasn’t until she missed her period a month ago that she decided to take a pregnancy test. As expected, the two lines that appeared on the stick confirmed that she was pregnant.

Shonda knew the baby was Dre’s because he was the only man she let hit it raw even though she’d been sleeping with two other guys on the regular. Hearing that Brittany was also pregnant bothered her at first until Brittany said she wasn’t planning on keeping the baby, and Shonda hoped she wouldn’t. If Brittany had Dre’s baby, Shonda would never get Dre to leave Brittany. Despite the fact that Dre cheated on Brittany and beat her ass on the regular, Shonda knew he had strong feelings for Brittany…he’d told her so last week when she demanded Dre leave Brittany for her for the twentieth time.

“Man, Brittany is good people, yo, and I can’t up and leave her,” Dre had said as they lay in her bed smoking a blunt after they’d finished fucking.

“Why not?” Shonda snapped.

“I just said she good people.”

“And?! That’s the only reason why you staying…because she good people?”

“Yeah. I mean, I know I ain’t got my shit together right now, but if I was ever going settle down, it would be with her. She’s my ride-or-die for real.”

“And what the fuck am I?”

“Yo, you better watch that mouth. And what’s up with the attitude?”

“You laying in my bed after you just finished getting your dick wet talking about settling down with another bitch, that’s why I got an attitude.”

Dre shrugged his shoulder’s. “You asked.”

“Well if she your ride-or-die, why you over here?”

“Cause I wanna be, now stop asking dumb questions and go get a nigga something to eat. I got the munchies like a mug.”

Shonda had started to tell him to go fuck himself, but she also didn’t want Dre to leave. It pissed her off to know that Dre really loved Brittany, but she was determined to change all that. Shonda had yet to tell Dre that she was pregnant but she was going to tell him soon. She only hoped Brittany went ahead and got rid of her baby like she said she would. Her and Dre’s future depended on it.



Black People: We Cannot Ignore Black Male Narcissism/Fragility Any Longer

Image: Courtesy of Linkedin

A few days ago, I was scrolling down my Facebook timeline and came across the news story regarding Tiarah Poyau that just made me anrgy and sad at the same time. The story of how she was murdered- shot in the face at point blank range- by a man simply because she told him to “Get off of me” when he began grinding on her, gave me chills because I too, have been Tiarah Poyah many times before.

I am Tiarah because years ago, I went to a nightclub with my girlfriends and we all decided to get out on the dance floor and dance together. While we were dancing, some strange guy decided to jump up behind me and began grinding on my ass. I turned around and pushed him off of me, the same way Tiarah did her murderer.

I am Tiarah because while out with friends one night, a man walking past me from behind decided that he couldn’t walk past me without brushing up against my ass when there was plenty of room for him to walk by without making bodily contact with me.

I am Tiarah because when I refused the advances of a different man, he proceeded to call me a bitch and tell me, “I wasn’t cute anyway.”

I am Tiarah because one of  my mother’s drug/alcohol suppliers, whom I’d never seen before in my life, obviously thought that I was easy and proceeded to hold his arms open, as if he expected me to hug him and when I didn’t, he proceeded to tell me, “…I must not know who he is..look how good he looks and how flashy his car is…” before he proceeded to call me fat- among other things- and tell me that “I needed my attitude adjusted.”

The only thing that separates me from Tiarah is the fact that by God’s grace, I wasn’t shot and killed by the many men who’s advances I have rejected in the past. I don’t know when, where, and why so many Black men became so narcissistic…when their egos became so damn fragile that instead of simply moving the hell along if/when a woman is not interested in them, they take her life instead. The sheer audacity of this irks the hell out of me. I have been rejected by many men in my life. Does it hurt? Yes. But to kill someone simply because they are not interested in you is a growing problem, sadly within the Black community, that we cannot and should not be expected to continue to ignored.

Over the past few  years, I’ve read several tragic news stories that are similar to Tiarah’s: A Black woman rejects a man’s advances and she ends up losing her life because of it. Mary Spears, for example, was killed in 2014 during a family outing when she declined giving a man her number after telling him that she was already involved with someone (she was out with her fiance). Seriously, when did this generation of men become so superior to Black women, especially, that they feel they have the right to approach women at random, then get in their feelings and resort to name-calling, belittling, and even murdering the woman because she’s uninterested? It’s these same Black men who are out here killing us (Black women) that go on and on about how Black Lives Matter, how the ‘white man’ is killing and mistreating us, how we (Black people) need to stick together. But why don’t Black Women’s Lives Matter to Black Men? I really need to know the answer to this question.

It baffles me that Black men want Black women to stand beside them, stand up for them, take up for them, have their backs..yet, they don’t have ours. Nate Parker has been in the news lately, more because of the rape he committed against a woman when he was in college than for his movie about Nat Turner, ‘The Birth Of A Nation.’ Nate and a friend raped a woman, but because Nate had apparently had previous consensual sex with the woman, he didn’t get convicted of her rape. His friend, however, did. The woman claims-before she committed suicide- that Nate and his friends constantly harassed her after the rape.

All up and down my Faceboook timeline, I’ve seen countless Black men go on and on about how “Hollywood is only coming after Nate Parker because of the Nat Turner movie,” and that “white actors have raped women, yet they’re not criticized as much as Nate is…it’s because he’s Black.” And it pisses me off each and every time I read ridiculous comments like that. So, because Nate is a Black man, we’re supposed to excuse what he did. Yes, the argument is he didn’t get convicted or go to jail, so that mean’s he’s innocent. Well, guess what- George Zimmerman didn’t go to prison for murdering an unarmed 17 year old Trayvon Martin, either. That doesn’t mean his ass wasn’t guilty or commit the crime. Regardless of whether Nate Parker went to jail/prison or not, I, for one, am still not excusing his crime, simply because he is a Black man. And yes, I am well-aware of corrupt police brutality and the ‘shoot first, ask questions later’ mentality that seems to apply to people of color, and I am just as angry about it as the next Black person. But being a Black man doesn’t give you power or control over our bodies or the the right to touch a woman- using any part of your body- when/if you see fit. Black women aren’t obligated to want to be with you, Black man; nor does our sexuality or our bodies belong to you.

Black men, I love y’all. But some of you have a very warped train of thought, especially when it comes to sexual violence against your own Black women. Expecting us to ignore the rape, verbal abuse, sexual abuse, mental & emotional abuse, and even murder that is sadly being imposed on us by some(not all) of you, is offensive, demeaning, degrading, dangerous, and unsettling, to say the least. Some of the main arguments I hear from Black men regarding Black women who choose to date White men is: “That white man don’t want you, he only wants to have sex with you. You’re going to become the White man’s whore?! How can you as a Black woman sleep with a white man after the way our Black ancestors were constantly raped, killed, and forced to bear the children of white slave masters?”  To the Black men who feel that a Black woman is a disgrace to her race for dating anyone other than a Black man, or who expects Black women to ignore sex crimes committed against women by men we see on tv like Nate Parker and Bill Cosby, ask yourselves how you can shoot a Black woman in the face simply because she doesn’t want you touching her or speaking to her in a derogatory, sexually explicit nature? How are you any different than those white slave owners who felt entitled to a Black woman’s body…who felt that it was their God-given right to pluck one his Black slave girls off the plantation or from her cabin, take her off, and have his way with her? See how that makes you a big hypocrite?  Just stop it, please and thank you.